Insecurities are things that we all have for various reasons.
If you don’t have at least one, you’re most likely lying to yourself. You could be insecure about an essay you have written, unsure about your future plans, unhappy with your appearance etc.
These things will come and they will also go and I am going to talk you through some of mine and how I am trying to deal with them and hopefully, this will help you all out too.
Most of these insecurities are based on looks and image and that is why there are two blogs posts, one about the outfits and this one about how I feel about myself. There is also a new video on my Youtube channel that I had so much fun making. Make sure you check it out.
This is something I have been insecure about for years. I used to hate looking at myself in the mirror or even being topless in my own house. It was horrible! The only real way to deal with this one was to try to be healthier and exercise more. On a daily basis, I have to ride my bike pretty much everywhere and I have found out that in the last 3 months, I have lost 4 Stone from exercising and altering my diet slightly. I am where I would like to be with my body yet? No! But Am I proud of myself? You bet I am!
I am not aiming to have the traditional physique of a bodybuilder or a male model, (Even though I’d love to model one day) I am simply just aiming to make myself healthier and happier. I am no longer chasing this false idea of perfection. Yes, Abs & Pecs – and all the other muscle groups that I can’t quite remember – are great but they do not make the man, they do not make you perfect. I am learning to be proud of my imperfections through positive affirmations, having an accountability buddy (Someone you can rely on to help you when you’re feeling low, mine are my parents and my closest set of friends) and just by doing things I love – like taking pictures of myself, buying clothes, dancing etc. – regardless of what others think of me.
This section is not about me not liking being black cause I’ll tell you now, I am madly in love with the Melanin that God blessed me with.
For as long as I could remember, my skin has never been great with spots as I have eczema which leaves my skin patchy. I have recently found out that this encompasses a bigger skin condition that I have called Atopic Dermatitis. It’s nothing life threatening but it is just not the nicest thing to look at.
To deal with this, I try to keep my skin as moisturised as possible but I also never edit it out of my photos. You may zoom in on photos and see raised skin near my mouth or around my nose. That is the Atopic Dermatitis but I refuse to edit it out because it’s part of me. And I am now learning to live with it. And it doesn’t make me feel as insecure any more.
I, like most, have plenty more insecurities than that but I try to address them in the same way. Putting God first and realising that in the grand scheme of life me being a bit rounder than my attractive friends or my skin being different to yours doesn’t really matter. We are all created with purpose and these insecurities can sometimes get in the way of us getting to our destiny. I choose everyday to never allow these insecurities to stop me and I hope you will choose to do the same!